Everybody had a version of that toy as toddlers. You know, that board with various shapes cut into it, and the matching blocks that fit them. As a child, you try to force the wrong shapes into the wrong holes, relentlessly. As adults, we find ourselves playing that very same game, just on a broader scale. The board is our lives, and the blocks are the people we surround ourselves with. Be it friends or significant others, we are constantly looking for those perfect fits.
We were too young to remember struggling for hours on end, but we sure did. Constantly trying to push that square block through the round hole. It seemed logical to us at the time. They were almost the same shape, except for those damned corners! I somewhat recall thinking to myself, if I can just push a little harder, or at a different angle, it will fit. Now as a grownup, you find yourself doing the same things, but the holes in our hearts are far more complex. You fall for some person that seems absolutely perfect… well, almost. If you can just round off a few of the edges, they just might fill that hole in your life for the most part. But in time, we see the gaps widen, and it becomes obvious that this is not the one.
But isn’t it the most beautiful look on a child’s face when they discover the right piece that fits in the right place? You can almost see the little epiphany that they have, where they think, “Of course! This fits perfectly!” It always seems obvious to us, because we learned long ago what pieces went where. But this is also the same feeling when we find that one person that fits our lives seamlessly. You think to yourself, “This is the person I’ve been looking for my whole life. How did I ever survive without them?” It is only then that you can look back and recognize that you were forcing all the wrong people into this person’s role, and it all makes sense.
So how do we find that puzzle piece that perfectly complements us? As you well know, there is no clearcut answer. All we can do is play the game the way we were taught at that very young age. Pay attention to the pieces you put into the board. Examine and analyze them thoroughly before attempting to fit them in that space. The more critical you are of each piece, and more selective you are with those attempts, the less those corners will get rounded, making that one true piece fit effortlessly. But be patient, for I know that once I find my perfect complement that fits me completely… it will be Heaven.
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Hello Kenny, I don\’t know if you remember me, I am Stacy Sparrow\’s younger sister Kammi. My earliest memory of you was playing a pac-man board game on the living room floor in my parents house. We were maybe 5 or 6 years old. I felt compelled to reply to this last posting as it is one of the most beautiful and insightful things I have ever read. I am a collector of quotes and love the use of metephors to simplify lifes most complex emotions. This is probably not the best place to fill you on who I am or what my life entails but if ever you are interested you can always e-mail at email@example.com. "When we are no longer able to change a situation – we are challenged to change ourselves." – Viktor Frankl -Kammi
You had to be a freakin\’ circle! 🙂
Octagon, huh? Very interesting.
I wandered upon your blog through someone else\’s blog. All I can say is… Wow. I read your entire blog this afternoon. I love most of the movies you have listed, and I teared up a bit while reading your list of things you miss.I will definitely check back here often… take care.Stacey
"It\’s too damn hot for a penguin to be just walkin\’ around. I gotta send you back to the South Pole"Persactly!;)
Kenny…you are so right on, it\’s almost scary! You have become such an unbeliveable writer! I still think you should write a book!! Love you!-Kiley
yes. I agreee.. you should write a book. I\’d buy it.. you\’re amazing, an inspiration to me. Keep writing about love and your metaphorical life explanations.. I love them.
I just made a wonderful stumble. I stumbled onto this blog, and will continue to stumbe here often. Thanks.
nothin hopeless about being a romantic…
I think my boards defective. Everything keeps falling in and out the other side…
I was moved to tears reading this as I recently became engaged to my perfect fit. I live in Florida and he lives in England so it has been difficult being apart when all we want to do is *finally* be together. I have searched for him my entire life.. and now the waiting is an ache in my heart I cannot begin to describe. I have sent him this link so he can read it as well. Your insight into life is incredible. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us.. I know that for me this entry put to words a feeling I have tried so often to explain but always felt lacked a certain depth of feeling. I could not have explained my own feelings any more precisely. Thanks again, Keiara.
Good angle, great way to explain it. You will find her, you can be sure. Either that or she will find you – I just believe that. I met mine in 1996, WAY after my injury (C4, in 1982) and i was really in love with her. I think everyone has that \’someone\’, and I think sometimes they don\’t really know it. But you will. I really believed in Forever – and still did until the beginning of 2005, which saw her \’find another\’, then divorce. I\’ve broken my neck too, and I know the mental part of breaking one\’s neck is as tough as the physical part, which speaks for itself. I have also found that divorce can be just as painful. (hell of a statement, I realize…) All I\’m saying is be careful. I know you\’re more careful now than before – but i think you know what I mean. Best of luck in finding her.Keep the FaithBuzz
Kenny,This is my second day spent, completely enthralled by your writing. You are simply amazing. I can\’t wait to read your next insightful blog.Kellie
Kenny~ Wow you are so right about that square peg into a round hole. Thank you for reminding me to stop doing that! I still seem to believe that the guy I am in love with one day will feel the same….of course it is utter nonsense……No matter how many corners I shave off of him he still isn\’t going to fit into my heart….I have to say you have filled a spot quite nicely tho\’!K~
reading this one was a lightbulb moment. i\’ve never really heard anyone put "the search" into such simple terms. round hole, square peg. its so simple when you let it be…. perhaps i should let it be then, eh?!