Missing in action…

He was a true renaissance man.  A jack of all trades, if you will.  Mentally, physically, academically… he could do it all, and he could do it better than most.  He graduated college with a 3.7 grade-point average without really trying.  Walked on to the college wrestling team a virtual unknown, and left a decorated athlete and respected team leader.  Extremely confident in almost any situation, his internal drive to be the best spanned everything from work to wakeboarding.  He landed a job in marketing/advertising that, while the furthest thing he should have done considering he had an engineering degree, perfectly fit his outgoing personality.  His ability to deal with people was unmatched and undeniable.
 
He brought with him a positive mindset and quirky sense of humor which were magnetic.  The one thing he lived for above all else was to make people smile.  He would stop at nothing in order to get a laugh from a friend or coworker. No matter what the situation, he could find a way to put a positive spin on it, and make it fun for all.  His sarcastic comments and sharp wit kept everyone around him on their toes daily.  Easy to talk to, he seemed to be the guy that everyone would turn to in time of need.  He had an uplifting quality which he used to make all those around him realize exactly how special they were.
 
Though he never realized it, he was one of the best looking guys out there.  Anywhere he went, heads would turn and he would not know why.  A genuine smile teamed with a style all his own, he could have probably had any girl he wanted, but would laugh if you told him so.  He had always thought of himself as that kid from middle school that no girls liked because he was too small.  In his eyes, he was the funny guy or the smart guy, absolutely not the good-looking guy. Somehow he hadn’t noticed that he had grown into quite a heartbreaker.  He always had ridiculously gorgeous girlfriends throughout his life, but swore that each one was completely out of his league.
 
The one aspect of his life he was positive that was unique was his heart.  He came from a solid family of a father that pushed him to be the best, a mother who loved him without condition, and a big sister that revered him above all others.  His love for his family and friends could not be matched.  He was always quick to help, defend, and praise all that were close to him.  To top it off, he knew exactly how to treat a woman, and was confident that he could make her feel sexier, more special, and more loved than any man could.  Anywhere he went with his girl, they left a trail of jealous onlookers behind, because it was obvious how she was treated.  He wanted nothing more than to make one girl unbelievably happy for the rest of her life.
 
He was one of those guys who could do anything.  Sure, he had his flaws like everyone else, but they were fairly minor.  He was me just two short years ago.  I really miss that guy.

Comments

  1. Man, I can\’t even imagine how down your down days must be. I\’ve gone through some pretty harsh stuff in the past few years and there were people who said they wouldn\’t want to be me. I pittied them. Even with all I suffered through I knew I had it good with everything else in my life.In an earlier comment, your friend the "real" guy said that you\’re "that one guy" he wants to be. No one said that to me on my down days.Be Well,Ken

  2. hmmm wow, I am speechless yet at the same time want to tell you so much. I came across your site on msn features and I have honestly never read through someones whole blog but with yours i was immediatly drawn in. Is it because you look like any other guy I would see around here, was it your humbled spirit? I dont know but I want you to know that I wish I could do more, hmm I am sure you will have tons of comments from all over but if you ever question the sincerity in them please dont let it be mine. I am sorry the woman you loved didnt stay with you but you have to know that there are people out there who look at the heart and not the body. I have no stance because I really dont know you but i can guarentee this site will inspire many and hopefully help you in some theruputic way. I am sure you may not ever even find this comment but if you do please know you touched a little piece heart tonight with your words and thoughts. God Bless, Jennifer

  3. Ahhh {{{{{{{{{{{ Kenny }}}}}}}}}Hey, I don\’t know how, If or when you will ever get to answer so many comments, but if you come across mine, please do email me, I have many friends in many situations, and regarding this one, I DO have on friend in mind, that I know can speak with you .. He was Previously a counselor for VETS, and PTSD, and Lat year he became a QUAD from a Motor Cycle accident..Because of what has happened to me, I hear all of the time.. You used to, Why don\’t you, blah blah blah.. and IT DOES hurt, or I get angry at my body for not working sometimes, and SAY IF I Could I would have blah blah..but it goes away fast now, and I keep my focus o my goal..You WILL get to that point too, Your writing is INCREDIBLE, I see the same people saying what I am doing too, reading YOUR WHOLE blog, we are drawn and inspired by your writing.. I am hoping that it is a healing tool for you…YOU WILL find that GUY again…He is YOU, He is in ALL of you, not in the PARTS, but in the soul..it hasn\’t ever been about back, arms, legs ect that desire to treat women well ect, or to make thier friends and family laugh and feel good about themselves, it\’s all about who you are.. and that did not change because of your accident, it just fell down..{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{blessings}}}}}}}}}}}}and Big hugs tooCallie

  4. You\’re still you, ya know.

  5. I have only briefly looked through your site, and I have a lot of comments on a lot os things that you have said. But this particular entry (and some of the comments to it) made me feel the need to respond.I can\’t say I have any idea what it is like to be quadriplegic, but I do know how it feels to \’lose\’ yourself. I have had severe rheumatoid arthritis for over seven years now (diagnosed at 17, I am now 24.) In the past seven years my joints have greatly deteriorated; my knees to the point that I have recently just had them both replaced.I have been doing a lot of \’soul searching\’ lately and one of the things that I came upon was that I forget who that girl was that used to dance and stay out all night with her friends. I can\’t remember who she is. That scared me.But the more I thought about it the more I am glad I do not remeber her. I am a new person now, and trying to find \’her\’ again can only bring negative feelings. Yes, it sucks to live with a crippling disease, but I have learned how to live with it the best I can, and I am very happy in life. To contrast a previous comment, you won\’t find that guy again. And trying to can only bring resentment to who you are now. For years I tried to hold on the my old self; but only when I made peace with my situation and started discovering the new me did I find true happiness again.

  6. Once again you have succeeded in making me cry. I love your writing style. I have never wanted to read so much about an "ordinary" guy. I am still hugry for more. I commented earlier that you should write a book and I will say it again, please write a book.

  7. You still are that guy!Everything happens for a reason…..I only read through a couple of your stories today but you sound like an awesome person that any woman would be lucky to have….if you do happen to read this send me an email I would love to get to know more about you……sixpackpayne@msn.commuch love ;}

  8. Angélica Katherine says:

    YOU ARE THAT GUY! OR MAYBE BETTER THAN HIM…believe me you still are handsome, interesting, inteligent, charming, madure, funny… damn! i\’m just 17 :\'( KISSES, HAVE A NICE DAY AND SMILE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  9. your space came to my attention by a friend that read one of your blogs. she told me were I couled find more information and thoungts about you and I started reading all of your blogs it so increadible how strong of a person you are. It most be dificult to be dealing whith all this things and you may cousting why this happend to you but God work\’s in misterious ways. so you will see everithing is going to be okay. AND IT DOSENT MATTER THAT YOU ARE NOT THE SAME PERSON IN THE OUTSIDE ANYMORE BUT YOU STILL MUST BE THE SAME BECAUSE ALL OF THE THINGS THAT YOU WRITE HEAR ARE SO BEATIFULL. SO YOU MOST BE THE SAME KIND PERSON

  10. you are that guy, nuthing will ever change your charm, your wit, your unbelievable undieing love for your family, they are your charecter, your charecter can and will not be brocken by your accident. That can and will never change who you are mentaly.Stay strong, and god bless!!love cas

  11. Life presents itself in a odd way that makes people either realize or not that we only have one life. I give you my blessing that a special someone will come your way.

  12. \’a big sister who revered him above all others\’ — i know that feeling for my own big brothers. My niece kelly has cp. She\’s on crutches, uses an automated wheelchair at school, she\’s 23 & this week we are going shopping. Kelly wants to change her style from tomboy to young attractive sexy woman. How often does anyone see the wonderfullness of themselves? I\’m glad you have.

  13. (((Kenny)))And here I am, two hours later, still reading. What can I say that hasn\’t been repeated over and over again by the comments left? You are still that guy and every attribute you had before February 11, 2004, you still have today. On a personel level, I can\’t believe that there is another person who is as much of a hopeless romantic as I am. How lucky your ex-girlfriend\’s were. You are truly an inspiration.Leah

  14. I\’m happy you had such a good relationship with your father, and simultaneously terribly sad that he has passed on. Parents are amazing people to me. You are a good writer, even if you are/were an engineering major (JUST kidding). You\’ve got a real talent. Take careKeith

  15. First off, I want to say that I feel blessed having found your blog. I just came across it the other day, but I have spent hours reading everything you\’ve written. I can\’t seem to get enough. I feel like I know you…as if we have been long-time friends. You have an incredible gift with words, and your ability to put emotions into writing is just amazing.This particular entry struck a cord with me because it made me think of my brother. He is 18 years old, and just a couple weeks ago he had a bad diving accident and broke his neck. You and he seem so alike, it\’s uncanny. He\’s a good looking, athletic guy with a big heart, and a great personality. He is the type of person that makes everyone feel like they are his *best* friend. The hospital has been amazed by the constant flow of visitors coming in and out of his room. Considering the seriousness of his injury, he has been unbelievably fortunate. His spinal cord was not severed, but bruised. It\’s been just under 3 weeks since the accident and the surgery to fuse together his 4th and 6th vertebrae, but he is making miracles happen everyday. I eagerly anticipate your new entries…you are an inspiration to all. My thoughts and prayers are with you.Chrissy

  16. You are truly an amazing man with a very big heart and that\’s hard to find in people these days. You are that same guy, I think with everything you have been through you lost site of that part of you because he is still there, you can hear it in your words very much so. With a heart like yours love will come your way if you want it and it will be when you least expect so I\’ve been told. Keep up the good work and keep the sense of humor because its awesome. Theresa

  17. truly inspiring please publish a book people need to read these words of wisdom and passion on a source other than the internet

  18. Hi Ken. Just dropped by (again) to say Thank You. I can\’t really imagine your situation, even with the in-depth look that you have so courageously provided. I face a somewhat different challenge — I\’m losing my mind — quite literally. I can\’t decide which would be worse – being quadriplegic with a healthy and active mind, or having a healthy body and being a permanent resident of LaLa land within it. Heck of it is, I\’ll never be able to answer that question, because once I inevitably GET to Lala land, I will no longer know to even ask the question. Talk about a Catch-22 of biblical porportion.. Sheessh.. Anyhoo, again just wanted to Thanks for inspiring me to create a blog to store my memories while they are still available to me. I have spent quite a few hours reading your entries, and will continue to visit as long as I can.Take Care.

  19. I looked over the other comments before leaving mine, and they all seem to say what I did…You are still that man.
    The heart is what makes up a person…and I don\’t think your heart has become hard, and that is a blessing…you have all of life ahead of you…it didn\’t end that day…it just took a side road 🙂
    I find your writing to be vibrant and alive. I feel like I should thank you every time I read your blog! You\’re a blessing, and I can tell by your comments that you are to others as well.
    I\’m just realizing you likely get so many comments that you may never read this one or the ones previous to this, but if you do, just know that I am so thankful I stumbled upon your Space!

  20. Hi Kenny…  What\’s been happening in your world?  are you M.I.A.?  How has life been treating you??? I want to know!!! 🙂
    I don\’t have my badge on right now but I will get a search warrant out soon if I don\’t see an update with in the next month…  Is that fair enough??  With love from a complete stranger… xox 

  21. Somehow, I think you knew you were good looking. And you probably still are, just in a chair. I wish you could be like you were, but with stem cell research anything is possible. You are young and could see this happening and walk again. That is if we can get George Bush out of office, but that is another matter.

  22. you know how you said in this entry, that you didn\’t realize back then how you were and what you looked like.  the same holds true now, K, you don\’t realize who you really are – i look at all the things you describe and think, that with the exception of one or two things that are physical, all the rest of those things are the \’kenny\’ things that made you who you were then, and still make you who you are now.  somewhere down the road, you\’ll find that you are still all those things and still kenny. you are so amazingly gorgeous, it truly takes my breath away, i could look at your photos for hours.  but you are so beautiful inside kenny, and that\’s what brings so many of us back here over and over.  that beauty never dies.

Trackbacks

  1. […] really amazing to think about how far I’ve come in a little more than a decade. From a justifiably depressed complete shut-in, to a road warrior in progress with a renewed sense of purpose and passion for […]

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